Monday, October 15, 2018

Authentic Love: Is there such a thing?

Love. The 4-letter word that has caused more heartache, pain, and confusion since the beginning of time.  

Whether we realize it or not, we are more conditioned today about what love is supposed to be like, than we want to admit.

Every movie we watch, the songs that we listen to on the radio like Drake's "Kiki do you love me, Are you riding... cause I want ya, and I need ya, and I'm down for you always...", the whole "bae" and "relationship goals" hashtags, books on hot, steamy, yet totally immoral sex (Fifty Shades of Grey anyone?), tv shows like The Bachelor that convince women that "true love" is earned based on actions, and the list goes on and on.

It's no surprise that we have no clue what real, authentic love actually is. The ugly and sad truth is that society has influenced us into thinking that romantic love is and should be a certain way.

And we've all fallen like complete fools for it.

You don't have to look far to see the effects it's had on us. Things that would have never been okay years ago are now not even given a second thought, because it's simply "part of the relationship process".

But in the end, it leaves people hurt and brokenhearted.

Today, it's completely normal for someone to assume you will eventually move in together, go on honeymoon type vacations... because that's the "normal step" you take before you make the actual commitment on marriage... if that's even a possibility on the horizon. 

Since when did love become a free trial-based game?

Real, truthful love is honest. It's kind, it's selfless and pure. Real love isn't measured on how much sex you have before you're willing to really commit to one another.

It's a lie. And that's where we've got it all wrong.

You might call me old-fashioned and think I have no clue what love is. And you're probably right in thinking I fell it for it at one point too.

We're all guilty in being in a sea of waves and just casually following whatever the crowd is doing.

But as someone once told me, "just because the crowd is going there, doesn't mean they're going in the right direction."

I know a love that went to the very depths of death to show us the true meaning of it. A love that didn't wait on our performance or perfection. It didn't wait on us earning that love.

That love is Jesus Christ coming here to us, even though we were in the darkness, messing up, trying to find it on our own standards.

He saw me in my deepest wrong and cried out, "I love her so much, that I'm willing to bleed here on this cross because I want her to be with me in eternity one day. Because she's worth it."

How can someone love us that much? Because He knew us and saw us before anyone decided what love was.

Ladies, you are insanely loved by God. If no one has ever told you that or perhaps you've heard it casually... here it is. God wants a man that cherishes you, respects you, and is willing to wait for you without any strings attached. 

He won't pressure you and take something from you that was never his to take in the first place. Because you don't deserve anything less. He is a man that's after God's own heart first. Because who better to go for advice than the One who is love itself?

Gentleman, you have a very important role. Society will tell you to be the macho guy that sleeps around marking his territory or with the one girl he "maybe wants to marry someday". 

But a real man understands how important a girl's heart is. Despite what culture is telling you, you keep fighting for what God ordained real love to be. Keep fighting for chasing after God's heart to show you what kind of a husband you want to be to your wife one day.

This topic has been heavy on my heart with everything in society that's been going on. But regardless of what others may think, the truth must be spoken.

Because real love speaks the truth, even if it hurts and offends.

I pray that you do some soul searching on your own, regardless of what the world is telling you. And when you come to find the authentic love that God had planned for you all along, you realize it was worth the wait.

// Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. //
1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

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